Chat Log #03 Dotagod TanLaw and "Sister"

Scenario: Dotagod TanLaw uses his own messenger to chat with friends.

Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw* my OWNAGE vision tells me you are invisible

"Sister" appears offline. Your message may not be received.

"Sister": wahahah
Dotagod TanLaw: no one can hide from me
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": so cnu inoownage mu ngyn hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: hindi ko sila kinikilala, too many...
Dotagod TanLaw: they are not worth remembering
"Sister": hahaha

Lawrence logged into his yahoo messenger.

Dotagod TanLaw: what the??
Dotagod TanLaw: an impostor
"Sister": huh????
Dotagod TanLaw: someone is using my old account (Law)
"Sister": ahahaha
"Sister": tsk tsk tsk
"Sister": maybe bcoz
"Sister": ur not u haha
"Sister": joke
Dotagod TanLaw: you're talking nonsense
Dotagod TanLaw: how could i not be me
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": cge ur name is?
Dotagod TanLaw: Lawrence
"Sister": cough,cough*deryk*cough
Dotagod TanLaw: a.k.a Dotagod
Dotagod TanLaw: I am not Deryk
Dotagod TanLaw: Deryk is a loser
"Sister": :))
Dotagod TanLaw: you dont believe me?
"Sister": wala lng hehhee
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": how wud i know u really aren't deryk?
Dotagod TanLaw: who is this deryk you are referring to?
Dotagod TanLaw: if you know him, why not ask?
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": bcoz i myt get a lie hehe
"Sister": since i can't see u guys in person
Dotagod TanLaw: ohh so you mean this deryk is offline?
"Sister": no this deryk is online
Dotagod TanLaw: i see
Dotagod TanLaw: then I shall OWNAGE him
Dotagod TanLaw: what is his yahoo id?
"Sister": think of his playing style
Dotagod TanLaw: i dont know this deryk
Dotagod TanLaw: he must be a noob
"Sister": really?
Dotagod TanLaw: must be.. because i do not know of that person
"Sister": but ddnt u play with him during our dota tournament in gamedes?
Dotagod TanLaw: ohh that deryk
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": hahhaa
Dotagod TanLaw: he is 20 years too early to be compared to me
"Sister": really now,
"Sister": bcoz i find him quite good
Dotagod TanLaw: im much much better
"Sister": haha really?
"Sister": really?*
Dotagod TanLaw: of course
Dotagod TanLaw: thats why im DOTAGOD
"Sister": hehe fyn fyn
"Sister": i believe u..
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: now you are in the path of truth
"Sister": haha
"Sister": ey bkt labas nang labas yung message n "dotagod_tanlaw is using an older version of Yahoo!

Messenger and certain features may be unavailable. Click here to invite dotagod_tanlaw to upgrade."
"Sister": naddc k b?
Dotagod TanLaw: no
"Sister": ic
"Sister": weird hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: its because I use Yahoo Messenger OWNAGE version
"Sister": owell
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": ryt
"Sister": hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: its true
Dotagod TanLaw: i also use Windows OE (Ownage Edition)
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": never heard if such a thing! hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: its because i programmed it myself
Dotagod TanLaw: i am not called Dotagod for nothing
Dotagod TanLaw: in fact i have millions of disciples worldwide
"Sister": hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: also i played in the Singapore World Cybergames 2006
Dotagod TanLaw: unfortunately nagkasakit ako nung game day, kaya talo Philippines
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": ganun
"Sister": awwww
"Sister": bad k!
"Sister": haha
Dotagod TanLaw: wei sha mo? (why?)
Dotagod TanLaw: my opponents poisioned my food
"Sister": "for my ppol"
Dotagod TanLaw: kasi alam nila sure win kami if I play
"Sister": yin wei ni bu can zia na ge bi sai (because you didnt join the competition)
"Sister": yin wei ni zuo ge traitor (because you are traitor)
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": kai wan xiao de ah (I'm just kidding)
Dotagod TanLaw: in wei ta men yaw wo se le (because they wanted me dead)
"Sister": zhen de me? (really?)
Dotagod TanLaw: zhen de (really)
"Sister": na you ah.... (how can that be?)
Dotagod TanLaw: in wei wo shr dotagod (because I am dotagod)
"Sister": bu hui ba... (cant be)
Dotagod TanLaw: zhen de (really)
"Sister": ta men bu shi huai ren (they are not bad people)
Dotagod TanLaw: tan shr.. ta men yaw wo shi (but, they want me dead)
Dotagod TanLaw: in wei wo haw li hay (because i am so great)
"Sister": zhen de?! (really?)
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": ni zhen niang zuo ge haw li hay de dota player (how did you become a great dota player?)
Dotagod TanLaw: wo shr tien tsay (i am a genius)
"Sister": wahahaha!!!

After 5 minutes..

"Sister": so quiet
"Sister": wat happened? nothing more to say? hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": well? no more?
Dotagod TanLaw: sorry, nagbabattle net kasi ako
Dotagod TanLaw: alt tab alt tab lang
"Sister": tell me about ur games kaya maybe i will learn something from d master hahaha
"Sister": aba! milagro nagtagalog!
"Sister": nung isang araw k p puro english e hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: talaga?
Dotagod TanLaw: ako po ay pinoy
Dotagod TanLaw: may puso't diwa
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": cge i won't disturb ur game muna hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: no problemo
Dotagod TanLaw: im also blogging
Dotagod TanLaw: ganun tlga ako maglaro
Dotagod TanLaw: lagi nga 1 versus 5 ako eh... kasi nakakatamad sila... mahihina
"Sister": hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: by the way
"Sister": w8 lng
Dotagod TanLaw: why are you chatting with the impostor? (Lawrence)
Dotagod TanLaw: he is the fake one
"Sister": y is it a crime?
"Sister": hehehe
"Sister": and how did u know?
Dotagod TanLaw: my Dotagod senses indicate that you are chatting with the impostor.
"Sister": wahahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": wats with the guffaw?
"Sister": haha
Dotagod TanLaw: its my trademark
"Sister": alryt
"Sister": how does dat sound?
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw* is *guffaw*
"Sister": i think i've never heard someone guffaw
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw* thats because, its original by yours truly
"Sister": nah i've read it in books b4
"Sister": i just never heard it being done
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw* true true
"Sister": haha
"Sister": it's weird when i read it hahaha
"Sister": by the way have u watched any good movies lately/
"Sister": ?
Dotagod TanLaw: movies? I only watch my DotA ownage replays
"Sister": aww ur no fun...
"Sister": i watched a movie knina
"Sister": un john tucker must die uber lafftrip hehhee
"Sister": maybe u cud watch it sometime
"Sister": so dat ur eyes won't be glued to the computer screen hehehe
Dotagod TanLaw: i have glasses naman
Dotagod TanLaw: i can bring Dotababe along
"Sister": oooh
"Sister": who's she?
"Sister": ur gf?
"Sister": hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: you dont know my dotababe?
Dotagod TanLaw: how cud u?
Dotagod TanLaw: i give you clue
"Sister": hey i haven't known u for a long tym....
Dotagod TanLaw: nickname has 4 letters
"Sister": and?
Dotagod TanLaw: there are two repeating letters
"Sister": edel?
"Sister": hahaha
"Sister": yihee
"Sister": naku may kaagaw k nyan
"Sister": tsk tsk tsk
Dotagod TanLaw: wth
Dotagod TanLaw: not edel
Dotagod TanLaw: bali there are only 2 unique letters
Dotagod TanLaw: cmon, its obvious!! *guffaw*

End Result: This chat log is only 3/4 of the actual log. What happened in the end was Dotagod slept after 11pm.
PS. That is his sleeping time.

Chat Logs #02 Dotagod TanLaw flirts

Scenario: Dotagod TanLaw wants to be Mr. Suave. Here is his version of picking up babes.

Scene 1
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Babe: mzta
Babe: haha
Dotagod TanLaw: haha OWNING as usual
Babe: wat da
Babe: cge na nga
Dotagod TanLaw: wanna watch my DotA game?
Babe: hahah
Babe: nxt tym
Babe: ey lis na me
Babe: bayeeeee
Dotagod TanLaw: aww :(
Babe: ahha uuwi na kasi me
Babe: hehe
Babe: bayee
Dotagod TanLaw: okay
Dotagod TanLaw: babay :(
Babe: maya nalng, pag bahay na me
Babe: hehe
Dotagod TanLaw: okay
Dotagod TanLaw: happy :D

Scene 2
Dotagod TanLaw: welcome back
Babe: tnx
Dotagod TanLaw: wanna watch me OWNAGE?
Babe: haha sure, how
Dotagod TanLaw: let me think
Dotagod TanLaw: i know
Dotagod TanLaw: punta ka house namin
Dotagod TanLaw: i invite thee
Dotagod TanLaw: nasa Escolta lang naman kami
Babe: hahaha
Babe: tapos, manonood lng me?
Babe: :))
Babe: cno ioownage mu
Dotagod TanLaw: everyone
Dotagod TanLaw: hmm
Dotagod TanLaw: wanna OWNAGE with me?
Babe: :))
Dotagod TanLaw: is that a yes?
Babe: no
Babe: :)
Dotagod TanLaw: why?
Dotagod TanLaw: its a chance of a lifetime
Babe: nvrmind
Babe: :D
Dotagod TanLaw: aww
Dotagod TanLaw: sad :(
Dotagod TanLaw: see my status
Babe: ahahahahaha
Babe: sabi mo e
Babe: hanap ka nalng ng ibang iownage
Dotagod TanLaw: owning alone is sad
Babe: kaya nga hanap ka
Babe: hehe
Dotagod TanLaw: :((
Dotagod TanLaw: its not the same
Babe: why not the same?
Dotagod TanLaw: because i want to OWNAGE with you
Babe: d me marunong magdota e
Dotagod TanLaw: its okay
Dotagod TanLaw: you stay in fountain
Dotagod TanLaw: and watch me OWNAGE
Babe: hahaha ganon
Babe: cge, nxt tym
Babe: ey cge lis muna me
Dotagod TanLaw: sad
Dotagod TanLaw: :(
Babe: hahaha bkt
Dotagod TanLaw: kasi alis ka na :(
Babe: find other people to OWNAGE w/u bayee
Dotagod TanLaw: ok..
Dotagod TanLaw: bayee :(

End Result: FAILED!! Its alright. No one is perfect.

Chat Logs #01 Dotagod TanLaw vs. Lawrence

Scenario: Dotagod TanLaw is online simultaneously with Lawrence Tan. Since Dotagod TanLaw claims himself to be the real Lawrence Tan, he then faces the "impostor".

Dotagod TanLaw: what the
Dotagod TanLaw: who are you?
Dotagod TanLaw: you impostor
Lawrence: ur teh impostor
Lawrence: the real dotagod
Lawrence: wudnt admit he's dotagod
Dotagod TanLaw: what??
Dotagod TanLaw: fool!
Dotagod TanLaw: you're the fake
Dotagod TanLaw: because you are not dotagod
Lawrence: wat makes u real den?
Dotagod TanLaw: my mere existence makes me real
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Lawrence: wat?
Lawrence: haha seems lyk u cant say anything
Dotagod TanLaw: wat?
Lawrence: ohh ym so lag
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: poor quality
Dotagod TanLaw: mine is OWNAGE-quality
Lawrence: moo moo?
Dotagod TanLaw: you're a cow?
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: i knew it
Lawrence: deryk nga hahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: who's deryk?
Dotagod TanLaw: that gay?
Lawrence: ikaw ung mahilig sa *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: of course I like to *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: its my trademark
Lawrence: gay?
Lawrence: wtf
Lawrence: callingurself gay
Lawrence: btw
Lawrence: wy did u call me impostor?
Lawrence: as if im a dotagod wannabe
Dotagod TanLaw: because your using my old account
Lawrence: this is MY account
Dotagod TanLaw: it was mine
Dotagod TanLaw: you old account thief
Dotagod TanLaw: tell me, what is your name?
Lawrence: Lawrence
Dotagod TanLaw: what the
Dotagod TanLaw: you have the same name as i do
Dotagod TanLaw: you really are an impostor
Lawrence: nahh
Lawrence: the real dotagod, cares nothing bout impostors
Dotagod TanLaw: how can you tell? you're no dotagod
Dotagod TanLaw: unless you call yourself dotagod, you cannot say what I do and doesnt do
Lawrence: "how can you tell? you're no dotagod" <- you're not dotagod either, bec if u are, u wud already object
Dotagod TanLaw: i am objecting!
Lawrence: but if u are dotagod, u wud say "i care abotu impostors"
Lawrence: whahaha
Dotagod TanLaw: you have broken logic
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw* i understand
Dotagod TanLaw: you must be someone I OWNAGED
Dotagod TanLaw: hehe
Lawrence: ey
Lawrence: ?
Dotagod TanLaw: what?
Lawrence: do u know allen gurrea?
Lawrence: do u know him?
Lawrence: allen gurrea
Dotagod TanLaw: allen who?
Lawrence: allen michael gurrea
Lawrence: do u know him?
Lawrence: y cant u reply
Lawrence: hey
Dotagod TanLaw: must be my disciple
Dotagod TanLaw: i dont keep track of them
Dotagod TanLaw: too many
Lawrence: so u know him ryt?
Lawrence: so, do u know him or not?
Dotagod TanLaw: of course i do
Dotagod TanLaw: he played with me in one of my tournaments
Dotagod TanLaw: sumawsaw siya sa victories ko
Lawrence: gud
Lawrence: i gotta tell u
Lawrence: he is gay
Lawrence: allen is gay!
Lawrence: allen is gay!
Lawrence: ^_________^
Dotagod TanLaw: you cant call my disciple gay
Dotagod TanLaw: you must be gay
Dotagod TanLaw: wala ako pake sa gender issues. basta he made my team complete and eligible to play
Lawrence: lol im not
Lawrence: you are Allen
Lawrence: hey
Dotagod TanLaw: what?
Dotagod TanLaw: dont refer to me as someone you call gay
Dotagod TanLaw: i am dotagod
Dotagod TanLaw: you are impostor
Lawrence: kilala ka ni bash dba
Lawrence: i ask bash bout something
Dotagod TanLaw: bash? must be my disciple
Lawrence: bash says dotagod sees allen as gay
Lawrence: since u dont seem to admit so
Lawrence: u are an impostor
Dotagod TanLaw: ha
Dotagod TanLaw: i ignore you
Dotagod TanLaw: i go chat with my dotababe instead
Lawrence: go ahead
Lawrence: i dont believe u
Dotagod TanLaw: fine!
Dotagod TanLaw: farewell
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: my dotababe left me
Lawrence: hi bash
Lawrence: nice excuse a while ago
Dotagod TanLaw: now you call me bash?
Dotagod TanLaw: you mst b insane
Dotagod TanLaw: according to my dotagod senses, bash is away at the moment
Dotagod TanLaw: how could i be bash?
Lawrence: -__-
Dotagod TanLaw: -__- ?
Lawrence: im tired
Lawrence: of finding who u are....
Lawrence: hay hayzzz
Dotagod TanLaw: *guffaw*
Dotagod TanLaw: thats because
Dotagod TanLaw: i am Lawrence Tan
Dotagod TanLaw: the one and only
Dotagod TanLaw: Dotagod
Lawrence: zzzz
Lawrence: im exhausted
Dotagod TanLaw: im paxi
Dotagod TanLaw: jk lng
Lawrence: paxi doesnt speak chinese
Dotagod TanLaw: kaya nga jk eh
Dotagod TanLaw: i am none other than Lawrence Tan
Lawrence: im gonna be afk for a while and rest my mind for a bit
Dotagod TanLaw: okay mr impostor

End Result: Lawrence didn't find out the real identity of Dotagod TanLaw.